An Unbelievable Prison Story

Think Ponzi Scheme and Batman

Convicts don’t get compared to superheroes very often, but in prison stories they seem to have a lot in common. Like Batman, they only operate at night; like Superman, they aren’t scared of bullets; and like the Flash, they will disappear on you in a split second. Of course the convicts differ a bit when it comes to morality so it’s not hard to believe some might stretch the truth in prison tales. And unlike politics, there’s no fact checking so the tales grow taller on down the line. Some of these stories I heard sounded like things out of the movies, one friend said he was made infamous in his neighborhood after he snatched a gun out of the hand of a guy pointing it at his head and then proceeded to beat him down. Another gave me instructions that rivaled a quantum physics equation on how to pack one hundred pounds of marijuana to successfully get it across the Mexican border. Maybe I was the crazy one since I couldn’t get enough of them. Either they were really accomplished liars or lucky to be alive.

But one of those prison stories has stuck with me for years. Not for it’s outlandishness, but for the lesson it taught that I have been unable to incorporate into my life.

It was told to me by a Ponzi scheme mastermind. Most would hesitate to call him a mastermind but it’s hard to argue since the guy leeched investors out of one hundred million dollars. Yea, that’s with eight zeros.

We’ll call him Steve but most people in prison called him worse. He was a class A jackass and the epitome of a grumpy old man. He had a twenty five year sentence so I can understand a bit of grumpiness but most folks kind of settle in and try to make the best of a bad situation. Not this guy. He was bound and determined to be miserable and make everyone around him as miserable as he was. 

Oddly, he claimed to be a follower of Jesus. 

Which is how he and I got to talking one day and I heard this story. He had spent his career in the investment business selling commodities. The last twenty five years primarily selling investments in gold and silver. Turns out, most of his investors were wealthy congregates of his local church where he was very active. He told me stories of praying with people right in their offices if they felt the need to pray before investing. He’d spent many years legitimately investing peoples money but somewhere along the way, he started skimming. Like so many sins, you start by stretching your toe over the line, then your foot, then your leg, and before long, you look up and that line you said you’d never cross is far behind you. For Steve, skimming became scooping and soon he was robbing one to pay another. He said he knew that gig was up when he did the books and found himself one hundred million dollars in the hole. 

Then Steve did something interesting, he went to see the pastor of his church and when he sat down in the pastor's office, just blurted out that the money was gone and everybody had lost everything. I’m sure that preacher was sitting there wishing he’d called in sick that day but after drilling Steve on just how bad it was, he got up and abruptly left the office. Steve sat there for thirty minutes or so and finally the pastor returned with Bob, the single largest investor, in tow. 

They all sat down and the pastor looked at Steve and said, “Tell him what you told me.”

So he repeated everything he’d told the pastor. Basically telling Bob that he’s taken and spent all the money he’d invested and there was nothing left. Bob had to have been devastated. Not only was his original investment gone but gold and silver had tripled in the last few months, so all that profit he thought was waiting for him, was lost as well.

Unlike most of us, Bob didn’t try to kill Steve right there in the church. In my mind, that right there is enough to call him a stellar Christian! Instead, he calmly started assessing his situation. Somehow accepting this nuclear bomb laying waste to his financial life. He mused out loud that if he acted quickly he might be able to keep his house but everything else he owned in the world would have to go. 

As he was discussing it with the pastor, Steve quietly excused himself and said he would be available if they needed him. Steve got into his car and was about to drive out of the parking lot when Bob came running out to the car. 

Bob motioned for him to roll his window down and said, “Steve, I’m devastated and my family is devastated, but I want you to know that I forgive you. I believe God’s in control and I trust Him.” Then he turned and walked back into the church.

Steve looked at me and said, “I had made many mistakes, but up until that point I still thought of myself as a Christian. As I watched Bob walk back into that church, I knew that whatever thing Bob had inside him that enabled him to forgive me so quickly and completely, wasn’t something I had in me. I knew if that was the mark of a Christian, I wasn’t one.”

Of course, that thing Bob had was actually a person, the Holy Spirit, in a large measure. When I heard that story, sitting in prison with nothing, it wasn’t hard to envision myself walking-the-walk like Bob did. But since I’ve been out and working and saving towards things in the future, when I put myself in Bob’s situation, I don’t like what I find.

I don’t have what Bob had either. Not completely.

But I want it!

I want to live life so trusting in God’s ability and willingness to care for me, that if all this stuff I think is important went up in a puff of smoke, I’d look on with a sardonic grin on my face. A life where the most important things to me are the things that are the most important to Jesus. Bob’s reaction wasn’t the average Christian’s, it was a mature Christian’s. Those who are preoccupied with thoughts of the world to come.

And while I can’t claim to live it yet, I’m getting closer. At times it feels like I’m walking up a fairground slide with grease on my feet. There is no doubt that the “stuff” of this world means less to me, but occasionally something blindsides me and suddenly I’m grasping for a handhold as I slide back down that slippery slide. One of these days I’m going to have such a firm grip on Jesus that nothing will shake me off. That’s the place where true contentment lives!

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